Dogbad 16 “How am I going to get out of here?”
1.Señor Hsss has been locked in an outhouse by Mister Wurlitzer the Dogbad town Assayer.Mr Wurlitzer has identified a high content of native gold in Señor Hsss’ urine sample and he won’t let him out until he fills a ten-gallon jug with the precious fluid.
2.Señor Hsss looks for a way out. He sees the decorative moon-shaped hole cut in the upper door: “Looks like that little opening is the only way out”, he says to himself.
3.He looks back at one of the holes cut in the wooden seat, and the squadron of flies hovering above it: “Unless-” “NO- I’m not that desperate.” It’s not a difficult decision.
4.Hissy begins to try to work his way through the small opening in the door, nose first: “Here goes nuttin’- NNGH! ANGH! EYEHH… AF-! UF-!” It hurts.
5.He succeeds in squeezing his head through the little crescent hole, sombrero and all (not shown, of course), but can move no further. He panics. “GRAWWLG!” “I’M STUCK!” “Ennn!!” “Enn-!” “Eeenngg!” “Uhh…” Señor Hsss knows full well how rediculous he must look from the outside. He’s got to extricate himself before anybody sees him. What if Michael McClure were to walk by and hear him?
6.Señor Hsss pulls and tugs with all his might. Suddenly he crashes free with a loud “PUT!” and bounces his head painfully off the back wall of the privy.
7.He regards his nose, throbbing with pain and moulded into the shape of the wooden hole. “It’s no use.”, he sighs to no one in particular. Then he remembers, there is another possibility- the “third wall”!
8.Señor Hsss turns and faces you, the reader and earnestly appeals for help: “Can anyone out there reach the JPEG settings?”.